If you and your partner are feeling stuck in having the same arguments, feeling disconnected, or struggling to feel heard and supported, you might very well be looking for a good marriage counselor (and you’re definitely not alone!). Unfortunately, many couples wait years before seeking support simply because they don’t know what to look for in a good counselor. And for some, a prior negative experience with a therapist who “didn’t get it” makes trying again even more intimidating.
Finding a good marriage counselor can feel overwhelming, especially when your relationship is on the line. But the truth is, the right counselor can make all the difference. So how do you know who to trust?
This guide will help you understand exactly how to find a good marriage counselor: one who is qualified, experienced, and the right fit for you. Whether you’re in Boise, Idaho, or the surrounding Treasure Valley, these 7 essential questions will help you feel confident before booking that first session.
By the way — It’s totally okay, and welcomed, to interview your therapists. We expect you to! We want this to be a good fit both ways and are happy to answer any and all questions that you have to help ease your nerves about this process.
1. Do You Have Specialized Training in Marriage or Couples Therapy?
Not all therapists are trained to work with couples and most graduate programs for counseling don’t teach it. In fact, many therapists have generalized training and may not have the tools or experience necessary for relationship work. When searching for a good marriage counselor, ask about what type of specific training they have taken in couples and marriage counseling.
Look for therapists who have completed marriage and family therapy programs, or have specialized training in theories such as Gottman theory, the Developmental Model, Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), or use other relationship-based models proven to support couples in distress. At Tree City Wellness, our entire practice is niched specifically for relationships and couples. Our therapists collaborate closely under expert supervision to ensure the highest quality care.
2. What Theories or Modalities Do You Use in Your Work with Couples?
Similar to the question above, understanding a counselor’s approach gives insight into how they will help you. Emotionally-Focused Therapy or EFT, for example, is one of the most research-backed and effective therapies for improving emotional connection in relationships. Attachment-based therapy focuses on the emotional bonds between partners and helps uncover the deeper needs behind each conflict. It helps you understand the “why” behind why you do what you do in relationships so that you can better navigate them.
At Tree City Wellness, we believe in not just talking about the issues, but helping you experience a shift in how you relate to one another in sessions so you can replicate it at home.
3. How Do You Structure Your Sessions?
Structure can help therapy feel purposeful and productive. Ask potential marriage or couples counselors how they approach the beginning stages of couples therapy.
At our practice, we begin with a joint intake session, then meet individually with each partner to gain backstory and perspective. After that, we dive into weekly couples sessions designed to build momentum and trust. This phased approach allows us to understand both the shared dynamic and the individual histories that shape it.
We also set clear goals, provide homework when appropriate, and focus on experiential exercises so couples can practice new ways of connecting in and out of session.
4. How Do You Handle Conflict During Sessions?
Conflict is inevitable in therapy. A good marriage counselor knows how to help couples navigate it without escalating tension or getting stuck.
Some therapists may let couples argue the entire session, but that rarely leads to meaningful change. At Tree City Wellness, we won’t let you spin in circles. We intervene when necessary, help you understand what’s underneath the argument, and guide you back to connection. Our goal is to give you new relational experiences in session so you know what’s possible at home.
We’re also not afraid to be direct when needed. You’re here to make change, and we take that seriously.
5. Are You Inclusive and Affirming of All Relationship Types and Identities?
This is essential in my opinion, especially in areas like Idaho, where affirming support isn’t always a given. Whether you are in a same-sex relationship, are navigating non-monogamy, or come from a culturally diverse background, your therapist should provide a safe, nonjudgmental space no matter what.
Tree City Wellness is a proudly inclusive and affirming practice. We work with LGBTQIA+ couples, poly relationships, blended families, and those navigating complex dynamics with care and respect.
6. What Is the Typical Length of Therapy?
A good marriage counselor will have a general idea of how long therapy might take, though of course this can vary from couple to couple. The important part is—they’ll want you to graduate eventually with the confidence to navigate life’s challenges on your own. Therapy is meant to be a tool, not a life sentence.
Our average length for couples work is around 6 months, though this varies based on your unique goals. We want to equip you with tools so you can manage conflict, navigate transitions, and reconnect with confidence. Of course, our door is always open if you need support down the road and we often have couples come back in for tune-ups when a major life event pops up and they want help navigating it. This is completely normal!
7. What Should We Expect in Terms of Therapist Involvement?
Some couples worry that therapy will feel one-sided or that the therapist will just “take notes and nod.” A good marriage counselor is engaged, interactive, and committed to helping you change the way you relate.
At Tree City Wellness, we don’t just sit back. We challenge patterns, offer new insights, and guide you into deeper emotional territory, all while keeping both partners safe and supported. We’re not afraid to call things out, set boundaries in the room, or bring you back when the conversation veers off course.
We believe therapy should be a place where you do the work, not just talk about the work.
Why Tree City Wellness is a Top Choice for Marriage Counseling in Boise
If you’re searching for how to find a good marriage counselor in Boise or the surrounding Treasure Valley, we invite you to experience the difference at Tree City Wellness. Our practice is grounded in:
- Emotionally Focused Therapy & Attachment Science
- Inclusive and affirming care for all identities and relationship styles
- Hands-on, experiential sessions that go beyond surface-level conversations
- Team-based support and expert supervision across all therapists
- Structured treatment plans that focus on long-term growth, not dependence
We know how hard it is to reach out. And we know the courage it takes to try again.
But real healing is possible. You can feel connected again. You can fight less, love more, and feel like you’re on the same team.
Book a Consultation with a Good Marriage Counselor Today
Ready to stop spinning your wheels and start reconnecting? Our Boise based therapists specialize in marriage counseling that works. Whether you’re in a crisis or simply feeling stuck, we’re here to help you find your way back to each other.
Book your consultation now and take the first step toward a stronger, healthier partnership.
Looking for a good marriage counselor in Boise, Idaho? Tree City Wellness is your trusted relationship therapy practice in the Treasure Valley. Reach out today.